And You, Sir, Do Not Have a Pair of Vegetables...

Okay, that's the strange radio-edited version of "Red Solo Cup" by Toby Keith, but it was the only thing I could come up with for a musical title!
I write today to talk about compost. Yep, you read right. I said compost. Okay, so that's not the only thing I'm writing about. I have decided that this year I'm going to put in a veggie garden in the backyard. I've been wanting to for a while, but the first year we had just moved in and were trying to get settled. Then the second year (last year) I was pregnant and not really in the mood for garden maintenance. But this year, especially with my work schedule, I'm hoping to put one in and get it started. I think there is nothing better than fresh vegetables. Call me crazy (maybe not literally), but I think there's even a better taste than store-bought, and definitely better than canned (from the store...I might mention home-canned later). Not to mention, it'll save us a bit on the grocery bill, which is a huge plus. If it's successful, I hope to continue gardening to show Jake and any future children the benefits. And, in one of my books I bought (for a steal at the Green Valley Book Fair, I might add), you can burn a lot of calories by working out in the garden, which helps with my weight loss!
I've always had this little urge to go back to basics: growing my own food, canning, making what I can, etc. I would love to have livestock if I could, but a small garden is the biggest bite I'm taking right now! I'm totally serious, though. If we ever get the land, I would love to try my hand at raising chickens or maybe a cow. Now, I realize my family reads this blog and their eyes are probably bulging from their sockets. This is just a desire I have. Obviously in no way is this in the near future, or even a farther future than the near future. But I do have a yearning to go back to "the old ways." Maybe the Amish have it right (there are other cultures, I'm sure, but they're the first that come to mind). They grow their own food. They bake their own bread. They sew their own clothes. What do the rest of us do? We as a people on this earth I believe rely too much on others than on ourselves. We've really become quite lazy. Images of "Wall-E" come to mind (for those that haven't seen it, it really is a good movie and makes you think a little). Why has a piece of paper or a small chunk of metal become more important than the essentials that keep us alive? People kill for it, when they could have taken that energy and put it to something useful.
But I digress...this is not an entry to make an economic statement. Well, not as bold a one as I was heading to make. That's for a later time. Right now, I'm excited about starting a garden and hope to keep having one for years to come. I'm also hoping to learn from mom about canning and preserving, so we can enjoy our veggies all year round. I'd like to put in cucumbers, tomatoes, spinach, green peppers, and broccoli. I'm kinda thinking I'd like to try carrots in planters, but I'm not sure if I want to take that on just yet. I'm not very good with potted plants, so the carrots may not make it very far. But they say it's a good one for little kids, so maybe I'll try it when Jake's a little older.
So when dad gets the rototiller up and running, he's gonna come over and till up a plot for us. I don't have the greenest thumb, so wish me luck!

Side note: I realize that I didn't really actually talk about compost at all! But I'd really like to start a pile or get one of the bins. If anyone has suggestions on the topic, I'd appreciate it!

I Got Mad Visions, Pictures and Premonitions

First of all, I can't remember if I've mentioned in previous posts that occasionally I have prophetic dreams. Whether people choose to believe me or not, it's true. I don't have them all the time, and in fact, they tend to be nightmares instead of dreams. Every now and then I'll have three nightmares three nights in a row. Unfortunately, when they happen, I don't know which night is the "prophecy," if you will. And even then, it's not like my dreams/nightmares are a play-by-play, this-is-going-to-happen scenario. I believe I saw the events the night my friend from high school died, as well as...yes, I'm going to say it...the "Virginia Tech Massacre." I won't go into details unless someone really wants to know, but it's not until after the event happens that I fully understand the nightmare I had which is normally a few weeks to months prior to the event.

All of that being said, occasionally...actually RARELY do I have premonitions, for lack of a better word. Basically what I mean is I'm fully awake. It has been known to happen, but it's usually even more few and far between than the nightmares. Although, there was one entire week that I had thoughts and images in my head that came to fruition. For example: When I worked at the animal hospital, one day we had a greyhound come in for bloodwork. My coworker and I didn't know anything about it, really. While she was getting all of her equipment ready, I had this random thought, "You know, it's funny. I've NEVER seen a mean greyhound. It'd be really strange if this one turned out to be mean." Stupid thought to think. Next thing I know, my coworker went to stick the dog (who we hadn't muzzled) and he whipped around and bit my hand pretty bad. Come to find out, the dog was extremely mean and nothing was supposed to be done without a muzzle. The next day, I'd had a whole bunch of "skunk dogs" come in (dogs sprayed by skunks) for deskunking. All I could think of was two of my regulars that run around and get into everything and how it was only a matter of time before they came in for deskunking. Guess who I had the next day?

All this being said, my latest is kind of a big one, because it happened not months, not weeks, but DAYS before the event. About three nights ago I couldn't sleep. At all. I tossed and turned. I closed my eyes. Nothing. I tried to relax and clear my mind, but all I could think of was what I would do if the house caught on fire. What would my escape plan be? Could I manage to grab a few mementos to be saved? How could I get the pets out? What if Jake and I got caught on the second floor? No matter how I tried, I couldn't get the issue of a house fire out of my head. I even told Mike that I couldn't sleep that night. Then, today, Mike and I are in the kitchen and we heard sirens. Where we are in Culpeper, we're pretty near the fire station, so when they get a call we can hear them pulling out. But these were close. Mike had just mentioned that they sounded like they were getting closer when we looked out the back door and saw smoke pouring from a house on the street behind us, the fire engines lining up in front. While I stayed at the house with Jake, Mike went down to the other street for a closer look. Thankfully, he said it looked like no one had been terribly hurt and that they thought it was a grease fire that started it. But all I could think of was the other night when I couldn't sleep and the images going through my mind.

Workin' Too Hard Can Give You a Heart Attack-ack-ack-ack-ack

Well, I finally did it. After much hemming, hawing, mind changing, talking with my family and friends, and a few tears...I QUIT MY JOB!!!! Yep, it's true. After 10 years and 10 months of working at the only job I've ever had, I up and quit.
And it's a huge relief. As much as I loved that job and the people there and the clients (some of them, anyway) and of course the pets, the stress level there was through the roof. I know that veterinary medicine statistically has the highest rate of suicides and stress-related meltdowns (I don't know if there's any other kind), but it wasn't that. I finally had it. I worked my butt off for those said 10 years and 10 months of my life and it was never good enough. If I did one thing, it was wrong. If I did it the opposite way, it was still wrong. If I did what I was told, it was wrong. If I did my own thing, it was wrong. And there was so much more that contributed to the issue. It wasn't entirely what I did (or didn't do, as the case seemed to be at times). I was informed at a few points in not so many words that being there was more important than my safety or even my family.
I had high blood pressure when I was pregnant that could have been partially caused by this (as a result I had to be induced early). There were times I would get so frustrated it nearly brought me to tears, and sometimes it did. I finally had enough.
I had hoped to have another job before it came to this, but we'll figure it out somehow.

This Ain't a Fairy Tale

I heard some sad, sad news the other day. A coworker and I were talking and she told me that she heard they were banning any sort of fairy tales in schools. FAIRY TALES! Now, I knew about the banning of certain books; in fact, Barnes & Noble stores were having a sale on these books. But now the banning of talk of fairy tales, all because they depict worlds with no God and show witchcraft. And people wonder what's wrong with the world today!
I'm serious about that last comment. I believe that's part of what is wrong with the world today. Without "fairy tales" (and this is of any kind, from Cinderella to Tom Sawyer to Harry Potter), we are taking away imaginations and the ability for people to think for themselves. We're taking away an alternate world for people to get away to if the day isn't going as planned. I know that certain fictions aren't being banned from the public, but by not allowing children to read them is teaching them at a young age that what you see is what you get. It doesn't allow them to think outside the box. This is a problem, even moreso than allowing the younger generations to watch too much TV or play video games. Fairy tales and fictions (if they are written well) teach right and wrong, cause and effect, just about any lesson you wish to teach.
People are "going crazy" these days because they have this reality and none other. They can't take their aggressions out in a sword fight or a duel of magic. They can't fall in love with a prince or a damsel in distress, or even have hope. That's what a lot of fictions have...hope. Goals in life. Even if it's to find the treasure or get the ring into the mountain. They keep going because they don't give up hope. If there's a challenge or an obstacle, they find an alternate route (going back to the thinking-outside-of-the-box thing).
As I said before, it's a sad, sad world out there. And it only seems to be getting more depressing.

Out With the Old

Well, here we are again. The beginning of a new year. What awaits us around each corner? Who knows. Here's a recap of my last year:

-My dogs contracted sarcoptic mange, resulting in Sprite losing a lot of her hair and losing a lot of weight, making us uncertain if we could do anything to fully help her...In the end, she has her hair all back and she has finally gained weight back and she's back to her adorable self!
-I gave birth to a 6 pound, 4.3 ounce little boy, Jacob Thomas Kestner, who has been the light of our lives!
-Also in the baby boom...my best friend had her baby girl Isla, another friend had her girl Paetyn, and three other friends found they were pregnant! Congrats to all the new mamas!
-The family cat, Birthday (aka Kitty), of about 19 years passed away (we assume).
-My cat, Jasper, that I've had since college, had to go live with my parents as an outside cat. I wanted to keep him, but first he scared us two nights after we brought the baby home by jumping in the playpen with him in the middle of the night. He was over twice the baby's size, so we were worried he'd lay on Jake and smother him. Even though we then kept the door closed, he kept testing his limits with the baby in my presence. So, mom and dad were great enough to allow him to stay at their place and we set him free.
-Because of the first thing listed here, Jake and I contracted scabies, which is not fun. A good slathering of permethrin cream and we're all cleared up!
-My niece, Britt, took her first steps and won't be taking her last for a very long time!
-Sadly, two amazing people in my life passed away...Grandma and Grandpa Moore.
-My oldest brother, his wife, and their daughter welcomed another addition to their family...Kaila Reese Miller (Kai for short).
-Mike and I hosted Thanksgiving at our house...and did AMAZING, if I say so myself.

Looking toward the future, here are some plans and hopefuls:

-We'll have the burial of my grandfather at Arlington National Cemetary.
-I will hopefully find a new part-time job, or better yet, we'll find some way by some miracle for me to be a stay-at-home mom (*fingers crossed*)
-Jake will turn a year old (don't know how I feel about that...)
-THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!!! (no, not really)

Here's hopin'!

I Sure Do Like Those Christmas Cookies, Suga'

Today was a great day. Why so great, you ask? (Well, maybe you didn't, but I'm going to tell you anyway!)
Mom and I went Christmas shopping down in Charlottesville together...with the baby in tow, of course. Not that he was really in tow. He did really well. He was laughing and flirting with the ladies the whole time! When mom and I got home, she helped me make cookies. Here's where it really made it great.
See, growing up mom always made a whole bunch of cookies and candies for the holidays. I mean, she could have had an entire bakery with the amount and variety she made. My brothers, dad, and I would sneak them here and there from the decorative cookie tins she had when she wasn't looking. When I was really little, she'd let me (and occassionally my brother) help her make them (my favorite part was cracking the eggs). The cookie she helped me make today was a jam-filled spritz cookie. Mom always had an aluminum cookie press that she'd use to make them look decorative and pretty. When my grandmother passed, we found one that she had, so it was passed on to me. I'd never used mom's before, so tonight she showed me how to use it.
I can only hope that Jake and any future kids of mine will have as much fun in the kitchen helping me as I did, and still do, with my mom.

We Found a Love in a Hopeless Place

I am completely and utterly a hopeless romantic. I loved the fairytales growing up...Cinderella, Beauty and the Beast, The Little Mermaid (obviously the Disney versions, not the Grimm's Tales). The damsel in distress, the dashing Prince Charming coming to the rescue, true love's kiss...yep, I've fallen for it all. So is it any surprise that I hoped for this to happen in my life? Doesn't every woman to some degree want her white knight to come charging in on his noble steed? But we don't live in that world. We live in a world of hurt and lies and corruption at every turn. One has to wonder how we can even make it through.
Well, I stuck to my guns. Sure, I had a lot of letdowns and subsequent heartache. I mean, look at me...I don't have the petite figure and perfect features that were drawn by artists. I may have put on a happy face, but at the back of my mind I had my doubts my prince would ever come. I was going to have my fairytale, daggone it!
And I got it. I believed that there was someone out there for me. It took us a little while to find each other. Heck, my husband wasn't even really looking (not like I was, anyway). He had no intentions of ever marrying. But there's someone for everyone. I truly believe that. Soulmate is a mythical "being" that I believe is not quite so mythical. In a world where I think statistics show one out of every three or five marriages don't last, you have to believe that someone will take care of you when you're old and gray, even when they can barely take care of themselves.
I'm going to get religious on you (so atheists, don't read on!)...Noah took pairs of all the animals. They were the soulmates of the animal kingdom. Noah had his own soulmate as well on that ark. God made it that way.
Mike got me a new smartphone as an early Christmas present. As I was flipping through the apps I could download, I came across one that is a daily Bible verse (there's also devotions and more to the application, but for now I just use it for the verse to kind of give me something to think about each day). Today's verse? "1 Corinthians 13:7-8 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends."
Certain recent events have hit me (and others) hard. And then this shows up on my phone. Some have given up on the situation, but I refuse to surrender. There is method to His "madness." We may not know what exactly, yet, but I can't give up on love. The Beatles had it right...all you need is love.

(Yes, I did end an entry referring to both God and the Beatles in one paragraph...)